i wish. i may. i wish. i MIGHT.

What for?

This may change, but for now: A place to log some of my goals for this coming year (and/or decade?) and be open and thus, semi-accountable for them. No plans for great prose or poetry. Just me. Saying what I wanna say, stumbling over my thoughts and trying to be vulnerable in an effort to grow, somehow, though I really don't want to be grown up.

I'm thirty now... I've been dreading it for the last few months. All the responsibility of the expectations of this decade loom in front of me, and I look back, longing for the carefree days of youth- though in those days I longed for the "wisdom of age" and the stability of "maturity". Ha! Now I know that the more I know, the less I know. The phrase I say most often lately is: I don't know...

Without further adieu, here is the list I composed a week or so ago:

30 things I  might do when I’m 30:
1. Pierce my (and Y's > when she turns 5) ears
2. Travel to France
3. Start living communally
4. Become an aunt (again) on my birthday
5. Move out of Beginner yoga and in to Level 2
6. Read 30 books
7. Sell my hair (that I cut when I was 29)
8. Obtain a pet with hair (hamster/rat/cat)
9. Rid my wardrobe of 30 items of clothing I keep for illogical reasons and don’t wear
10. Buy 15 items of clothing I would actually wear for good reasons (ie: france)
    a. figure out what would be logical reasons
    b. figure out what I would/should actually wear
11. Run a mile? in less than 30 minutes...
12. Home improvements:
    a. reseal the bathtub & add splash guards
    b. paint the inside of the bathroom cabinet
    c. replace the upstairs windows
    d. install attic fan
    e. barn improvements:
        1. finish blocking up the east side
        2. install garage door opener
        3. replace window
        4. add siding or paint
    f. reorganize closet and toys to make “playroom” in to “melinda’s room”
    g. have M&P sort through things in attic space to free up at least 1 side
    h. make curtain for back porch door
13. 30 dives into various swimming pools
14. 30 days of summer @ a swimming hole (wearing 30 SPF of course)   
15. Take better care of my eyes-- firming lotion @ night, try to get my “beauty” rest, blink more often when I’m on the computer
16. Make it “30 strikes and you’re out” instead of 3 ~ be kinder to myself, and others
17. Make more garlands, 30 more!?
18. Spend 30 min/wk reading the Bible
19. Make albums for Yosie of photos and artwork (binder type)
20. Write 30 heartfelt letters to people such as (but not limited too): Yosie’s birthmom, future Yosie, future me, future David, Mom, Dad, misc. loved ones.
21. Make a time capsule of 30 items
22. Try not to get too carried away with the “30” theme
23. Write on the walls (no less than 30 words)
24. Ride my bike instead of driving 30 days in a row
25. Color my hair ~ pink, then auburn
26. Make the 30th, of every month that has one, special or- *ahem* .
27. Make or Remake 3+ items of clothing
28. Get another tattoo
29. Give hugs to 30 people I’ve never hugged before
30. Count to 30 more often before I make a choice.